You are emerging, but your church is not July 12, 2006
Posted by fajita in Christianity, Church Planting, Philosophy/Religion, Post-restoration/Restoration Movement, emerging church/emergent.trackback
What happens when a person begins to expand his or her faith search outside the acceptable or normal boundaries of the church they attend?
The emerging church is really a phenomenon occuring in the hearts of people in various locations. It is not a denomination or institution, but rather it is a move, a desire to move into something more in line with what Jesus seemed to be trying to do when He walked the earth.
So, let’s say you are “emerging” from a limiting set of beliefs, whether liberal or conservative, but your church or denomination is not emerging from the systems, theologies, and institutional structures that perpetuate non-growth. What happens when you are emerging but your church is not?
Has anyone had this experience? If so, what are you doing about it?
Where is your safety zone?
What complicates this experience?
What pressures are there to get back to “normal?”
How do you do friendships and relationships when suddenly you are out of line? Are these relationships taxed?
What’s your experience?
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And, if just thinking about this stuff depresses you, click here for a good laugh.
What happens? Ultimately?
You get fired.
Or “asked to resign”.
Where is your safety zone?
Select people in the church–if you can find them.
We connected with people outside of the church community that would have no reason or desire to be in the current community we found ourselves in.
What complicates this experience?
The almost genetic need to scrutinize and undermine anything that is “different”.
What pressures?
Constant nitpicking, overt attacks, undermining from ignorant lay leaders.
Relationships?
Always taxed by either unspoken tensions, or shared abuse at the hands of others.
Experience?
It would take an hour just to give you an outline.
What happens when you are emerging but your church is not?
You become totally frustrated and start seeking ways to make others see things your way.
Has anyone had this experience? If so, what are you doing about it?
Yes, praying, fretting, blogging!
Where is your safety zone?
Blogland, some very good friends who will listen and know that I am not just being fanatical.
What complicates this experience?
Family, friends, longstanding traditions
What pressures are there to get back to “normal?”
People start treating you like you are a trouble maker or just a freak. You feel like it would be better to just “fit-in”
How do you do friendships and relationships when suddenly you are out of line? Are these relationships taxed?
I have been hurt and left behind as a friend becasue I am considered as negative and radical as I strive to grow as a Christian.
What’s your experience?
Utter frustration….but trying to work around it in my head.
I wonder if this isn’t why the blogsphere has become such a popular hangout for emergents. We all share (to one degree or another) this frustration – we see a problem very clearly, but not everyone in our communities of faith share the perspective, and it is VERY difficult to articulate in a way that people will understand.
What the internet does, though, is allow us to form communities outside of the physical boundaries of churches, share experiences, and slowly develop a language for what we are experiencing. It is also a place to go to remind ourselves that we aren’t completely nuts.
I’m blessed to be in a faith community where people are starting to take some of the issues in the emerging conversation seriously. But I still sense a strong, tacit resistence from some. It CAN put strains on friendships – anyone whose default personality at church is to say “We’re okay – we’ve got it all right, now” is going to always feel uneasy when emergent questions become the subject of discussion.
Right now, I’m less interested in how to become conversent with criticism and more interested in how to become conversent with fears about what will happen if we go down emergent paths – which I think is the real problem at this point.
Been there ~ done that! About 1 1/2 years ago, a group that had split from our former congregation, (it split about half and half) merged with another group. (Cof C and Christian Church)
We are still defining ourselves, but moving in a good direction.
I think prayer has to be upmost in the what to do list. That and seeking quiet time with God to allow him to direct your paths. Of course, the fact that we had a “group” of others was helpful. Although, it became real apparent early on that not everyone left in the first place for the same reason. Many have gone back to the original congregation for need of structure.
So….you pray and you keep putting one foot in front of the other and allow yourself to question, grow and change in Him.
Has anyone had this experience? If so, what are you doing about it?
Trying to take it one day at a time. Luckily, while in Middle Tennessee, my Sunday mornings are fine at Otter Creek. The problem comes with trying to be involved with a college ministry at MTSU that I feel is leaps and bounds away from me theologically. Its as if I can’t even relate to them anymore. I took a break from leading worship there, because my heart wasn’t in it. I was struggling with being judgmental of people who hold to views that I feel are unacceptable, and also struggling with judging people who sit in a building all day and talk about Jesus when right across the street is a huge mission field that needs Christians to show Christ’s love in a different way….. ON THE CAMPUS. When we sit in a building and quadrant ourselves off from others, we are doing exactly the opposite of what Christ did.
Where is your safety zone?
My family (for the most part) who agrees with me on many, but not all things, but is still willing to listen and digest my points of view. And I guess the blogosphere. Fajita.wordpress.com
What pressures are there to get back to “normal?”
Like I said in my comment the other day, there is definitely a temptation for me to want to give it all up and be a secular modernist. I think life would be so much easier that way. I look out for number one, stick with rational thought, and I’m good. I know I wouldn’t be happy there, but in the short term, life would make a whole lot more sense.
How do you do friendships and relationships when suddenly you are out of line? Are these relationships taxed?
My best friend thinks I’m crazy to a certain extent. He still loves me,and agrees with some aspects of what I believe, but when I start talking about how I don’t really believe in hell, that makes him uneasy.
Many people who are deepening their faith, questioning the structures and systems they are embedded into, and trying to (re) everything in their spirituality feel the ache and strain of being precariously positioned between the strong forces of homeostasis (that which pulls us toward sameness and status quo) and the strong forces of the cry and desire of freedom and exploration (that which pursues risk and change).
This present unsettling will persist in many as wave after wave of people learn to question their context, themselves, and their faith. It will not happen quickly with existing churches, but rather with individuals and new church plants.
Matt wants to know what will happen if emerging types continue down the emerging path. I think that is the question on a lot of people’s minds. I don’t know the answer, but I think it might have something to do with disruption, disorientation, discovery, and destination…do-over.
…and the point that I may not have made clear is this: the real problem isn’t that emergent doesn’t make SENSE to people (I think, deep down, it does) – the problem is that there is great fear of all of the “ds” that you just listed. So I’m less interested in defending emergent from criticism, and more interested in finding ways to speak to the fears that are behind the criticism.
funny…….i liked the “good laugh” except i think the huge long diatribe people are more than 1…….at least on my blog……..i really still don’t know exactly what emergent is……..but i do know what its like to try to grow in relationship with Jesus and have no one understand……..i’ve never experienced being misunderstood so much in my life as i have in the past few years……but learning to understand its a lifestyle thats here to stay……..Jesus was misunderstood and offended people for life……..but He got His fill-up from the Father and a few close friends………but of course He always loved everybody even if He didn’t feel they understood Him………thats what i wanna do……..
Speaking to the fears is certainly a tough one. How can one emerge without getting PO’d or depressed? I think it can happen and I think it can happen in a non-emerging context.
For example, I have a friend who preaches in a Texas church who is doggedly committed to challenging the Church of Christ. He wants to emerge from within. He’s a lifer C of C guy and always will be, but not because he carries their bags. No, he loves these people and will do whatever he can to make a difference. He knows that in his lifetime he will not “progress” for himself to a place of communal faith that he sees as best, but it is worth it for him to sacrifice that in order to get a lot more people a few steps farther than they are now and set up the next generation for a better transition into a better place.
I have so much respect for his calling, but it is not the only way to respond and not the best way for anyone not compelled to do it. Others may be called to respeond by exodous. Others by church planting. Others by house church. Others by foregin mission work. Others by doing church within a church. Other by stealth. Others by forming conversation groups & book clubs. Others by developing a ministry of their own that does not require a church sanction. I know of a woman who sends home made cards to people in prison and people aho are sick. She is an artist and nothing gives her greater joy than to create an original card and give it awat. That is beautiful.
Others may ignite something not yet thought up.
This is a time for prayer and wisdom. This is time for patience and clarity. It might be time for sacrifice (not rolling over, but sacrifice). There are pre-emergents all over the place who have simply not asked the questions that will jar their comfy, but dulling position. Some, to be honest, are dying to hear someone say anything other than what they hear constantly in their churches, but are afraid to act. Our voices give permission for people who don’t think they have permission.
No matter how hard it hurts, we can’t just quit. Justin’s words are ringing in my ears when he talks about giving up and becoming a secular modernist. The temtpation is there to let the flow overwhelm and either carry us away or drown us, but there is no need for those be our only options. If what we are really emerging toward is getting deeper into the story of God and out of the story of denomination, systematic theology, or even nationalism, if we are really seeking to privilege God’s story in our lives over every other story, if we are seeking to really become what God created us for in the first place, then it makes no sense to do anything but pursue that very thing.
I don’t know if I’m “emgering” or “emergent”, but I certainly feel a lot of these same things. And now that I’ve been diagnosed with this affliction, perhaps I can finally get some “treatment”.
Funny story – our church is spending our mid-week services this sumemr focusing on our mission. Last night, the speaker was talking about gifts and ministries and challenged us to think about what our gifts were and how we might use them to minister to others. I’ve already done a great deal of thinking about this topic, but last night I was in a very “emergent” mood, so I wondered…
I wonder if one of my “gifts” is being discontent with the status quo. How does this fit into the nice, clean packages we’ve made for gifts and ministries (“some will be prophets, some will be teachers”, etc)? Does this make me a prophet, or a teacher? I know many of my Brothers and Sisters would simply call me a “complainer”. Perhaps I should start a new Complaining Ministry at my church?
Another fear: the fear that, by embracing the values of emergent, one is rejecting/condemning prior generations. And/or if you are a part of prior generations – the fear tha tyou are yourself being rejected.
Complaining ministry. Ha! That’s great. The gift of complaint. Labels are powerful things and can discount whatever the negatively labeled person has to say, even if what that person has to say rings true or makes sense. The label can deafen the ears of many.
Matt, you bring up another great point. Emerging generously from the past without discrediting or devaluing it can be a challenge. There is usually a baby in the bath water that deserves to make some noise. But good parents don’t let their babie flail around forever in the same bath water. Hopefully what people who are growing are doing is carefully separating the baby from the bath water, wiping the baby off and clothing it in something presentable and good.
Or, think about it this way: It sounds arrogant to say, “I’ve outgrown my church (denomination).” In fact, it probably is arrogant in most cases. The thing is that there are parts of every church structure that are not fertile soil for growth. It’s not that you’re outgrowing it, but rather that you are nourished better in other “soil.” It’s not a rejection of soil in general, but rahter a search for soil that promotes the best growth.
Chris wins the smartest guy ever award. srsly.
Have you thought about writing a book Chris?
[...] Chris Gonzalez has an interesting post today discussing when you are emerging but your church isn’t. [...]
well…i definitely don’t think that my church would be comfortable describing itself as emerging. I do describe myself as emerging. It truly doesn’t bother me very much at all. Off the top of my head: 1) I don’t believe that genuine spirituality can’t occur in traditional contexts. It’s not contexts that are broken; people are broken. Contexts are just contexts; they’re not definitive. 2) My own resonances within the emerging church movement tend to be more reconstructionist (using Stetzer’s taxonomy) with some revisionism. But I have not found traditional evangelicalism to be so tepid that it can’t accommodate emerging church reconstruction! I don’t see evangelicalism as fatally static. I believe that it can change. I believe in my church I’m seeing it change as the church becomes increasingly transpropositional. fwiw
What happens? Well, sometimes you are “silently disfellowshipped” from your church as I have been in the cofc. Relationships strained? It’s difficult to form relationships when they are contingent upon being of the “same mind”. What do you do? Well, I quit going to church. I haven’t been much in about 10 years. Your blog and others like it on the internet are the only places where I read things about people’s experiences that make me feel like I’m not so weird afterall.
I might add another question? What does one do if you are emerging and your spouse isn’t as is the case with me? She sees my digression from doctrinal c of c as being unfaithful not only to the church but to her as well. Anyone else in that marital boat? What did you do?
Great comments. I would tend to agree with Stephen almost all the way when he says evangelicalsim is not static. It is when it is and it isn’t when it isn’t. Now I might be mixing up my evangelicals with my fundies, but there is a spectrum of flexibility. There is a point at which some evangelicals becomes fundies when change is too fast. It’s backlash.
What I think is happening with emerging people is that they are being drawn to something (maybe within a church maybe outside of a church) that is different. As strange as this may sound, there is not enough diversity in the church for it to be genuinely unified. Or maybe there is not enough unity for it to be genuinely diversified. Whatever the case, emerging people might just have the opportunity and desire brewing with in them to ingroup some of the outgrouped and their community of faith might not like that.
I praise the churches that can handle change, and I praise the churches that cannot and know it. I do not praise churches who market themselves as something they are not as a marketing ploy. “Come to our church, we’re not religious.” Bull! If you have to say that, then you are indeed very, very religious.
There you gone done it, got me rambling and ranting. Keep up the conversation.