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“Adopted Children Badly Informed” – BBC November 24, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption.
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Click here to read the BBC article.


Your worlds of adoption – Zoe October 10, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption, Family Science.

Wow! What stories. Thanks to all of you who shared. Please, if there are more stories out there, feel free to comment. The complexities and challenges in adoption can be as unique as each family. But on the other hand, so can the blessings and rewards.

Also, there is much passion and emotion from many different directions on the topic of adoption. I haven’t met anyone yet who is involved in adoption in some way to be ho-hum about it. Now, there may be people out these who are, but I am not meeting them.


Missong the Zoe Worship Conference this year was so hard. I especially missed my blogger friends who I only met last year at breakfast. It was so hard not to be there. 

4 Worlds of Adoption October 7, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption, Family Science.

If you aren’t adopted or know someone who is, then you might not think much about adoption. However, if you are adopted or have adopted a child, then you think about it quite a bit.

I’ve had several conversations with people over the past few weeks who have adopted children are are themselve adopted. These conversations are powerful. I am moved when I hear people speak of their adoption experiences.

So, let’s have a little intro to the 4 worlds of adoption. The following are in no specific order and are not actually comprehensive, but do cover the majority of types of adoptions.  The following categories are borrowed from a paper written by Harold D. Grotevant entitled, “Openness in Adoption: Re-Thinking “Family” in the United States.”

World1: Domestic infant adoption – This is the kind of adoptioin in which an American couple or individual adopts an infant. This kind of adoption is decreasing in frequency as compared to past decades as there are fewer infants available in the U.S. for adoption.

World 2: International Infant Adoption – This is the kind of adoption in which an American couple or individual adopts an infant from another country. It doesn’t take much imagination to realize that there might be some challenges for the family and the adopted child as he or she ages. There is an increasing frequency of international infant adoption.

World 3: Foster care Adoption – When a couple or individual adopts a child who has been in foster care. Since children arrive in foster care for a number of reasons, most of which can be traumatic for the child, these adoptions pose a number of different kinds of challenges as compared to other adoption arrangements.

World 4: Stepfamily Adoption – When a stepparent adopts a stepchild. Now, in order for this kind of adoption to occur, there are some antecedents. Death of a bio parent, relinquishing or parental rights or somenhing like that. In just about every way possible, there was a loss experienced by the child.

Here’s another little piece of the adoption world. 20,000 American children age out of the foster care system. Think about it, 20,000 18 year olds transitin from foster care to “real life” without anyone to call family. Granted the foster parents might be considered family, there is a difference between fostering a child and adopting one.

I have a growing respect for the complexities, challenges, and heroic efforts that make up adoption.

Anyone out there have an adoption story they don’t mind sharing with the loyal dozens who gather here?

Bastards Speak September 7, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption, Family Science.
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I told you a few days back about Bastrd Nation. Well, they found me. Check out comments in my blog post here. Thanks for stopping by my new friends.

For years, people who were adopted were not allowed to know about their biological history. Any contect with their birthparents weer forbidden. Adoptions were completely anonymous forever. This was done to “protect” everyone involved. Recent research has shown that these arrangements are not necessarily “protecting” of people invlved. “Open” adoptions (where information exchanges at varying degrees are permissible or encouraged) are more and more the norm.

If you’re not connected to adoption issues, you just don’t know what a huge deal this concept of openness is. Think about the potential identity issues for adoptees, the potential grief issues for birthparents, and the potential family formation issues.  

I am sure the folks at Bastard Nation and their website could inform you about adoption issues and their advocacy postions.

Why don’t you check out their mission statement below.

Bastard Nation(SM) Mission Statement

Bastard Nation is dedicated to the recognition of the full human and civil rights of adult adoptees. Toward that end, we advocate the opening to adoptees, upon request at age of majority, of those government documents which pertain to the adoptee’s historical, genetic, and legal identity, including the unaltered original birth certificate and adoption decree. Bastard Nation asserts that it is the right of people everywhere to have their official original birth records unaltered and free from falsification, and that the adoptive status of any person should not prohibit him or her from choosing to exercise that right. We have reclaimed the badge of bastardy placed on us by those who would attempt to shame us; we see nothing shameful in having been born out of wedlock or in being adopted. Bastard Nation does not support mandated mutual consent registries or intermediary systems in place of unconditional open records, nor any other system that is less than access on demand to the adult adoptee, without condition, and without qualification.

Bastard Nation August 31, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption, Grad School Life.

So, as part of my life in doctoral studies I have to learn about the research projects I am joining. One of the projects I am joining studies adoption.

So, in order to become familiar with the project I am reading all kinds of scholarly journal articles. These articles are by nature informative and somewhat dry, full of stats, research methods and discussion of the results. I do not look to these articles for humor – WHATSOEVER.

Also, when I think of adoption advocates and researchers, I think of nice people with good attitudes – sophisticated and educated. So, imagine my surprise as I was reading an adoption journal article as I rode the 465u into town and found the words, “BASTARD NATION,” in the article. I laughed out loud. The picture in my head – geez.

I pictured this ripped jeans band of ruffians with baseball bats in hands with their leader, face full of scars, looking you dead in the eye and saying, “We’re Bastard Nation, got a problem with that?”

I apologize for my imagination, there is no excuse for it.

Bastard Nation (found appropriately at http://www.bastards.org/) is an actual advocacy group fighting for the rights of adoptees to open the adoption records. Their cause is legit.

My New Life August 16, 2006

Posted by fajita in Adoption, family, Grad School Life.
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In less than 2 weeks I begin working as a Research Assistant at a major research univeristy. This will be a whole new world for me. Can’t wait to get into it.

I’ll be working with profs who are incredible researchers – an dpretty nice people, too.


I have been hanging out at a church called Solomon’s Porch. It’s different on the surface and deeply from my Restoration roots, but there are many similarities.


Setup in auditorium, instrumental worship, interactive sermon, baptism, decentralized information flow.


Bible based, seeking to be like Jesus, baptism by immersion, weekly communion.

From a theological perspective, there seems to be a lot more flexibility at Solomon’s Porch than at any of the churches I have attended in the past. Since SP is not part of a denomination and is not a church with a lot of years behind it, the flexibility does make some sense. The challenge for SP will be over the years. will it settle into an inflexible way of being. Time will tell.


Public transit. I will ride the bus 4 days a week from the burbs to the city. I wanted to live in the city, but that just didn’t work out.